Where I’ve Been

It really has been forever since I posted last. Like 7 months forever. In the blogging world that really is forever. I have still been here and reading the sweet comments about the freezer cooking and replying to the lovely emails that some of you have sent. But I have been busy with life, so if you had sent me a message and I didn’t get to it, I do apologize. I feel like I have traveled down two or three roads while “away” even some of those roads being traveled on at the same time, if that’s even possible.

My last post was in early June. To catch those of you up who may have not read some of my previous posts, I left a teaching career in 2012 and moved for my husband’s new job and to be a stay at home mom. Though I wanted to be at home with my boys when they were young I had real struggle and internal battle between the life of being a teacher (something that I love) and staying home to be with my children while they were home (something else that I love). I even wrote a few posts about that battle each time coming to the conclusion that staying at home was what I was “meant” to do.

After a year of being home, and with none of professional life I was so used to, I had many moments that I really regretted my decision to stay home and missed the career at a fantastic school I gave up. Looking back, I was not prepared for the life I would live as a stay at home mom (are we really ever?), and had quite the false pretense of what it would entail.

So, I took a first grade teaching position last summer, shortly after my last post at a wonderful little school, even knowing I was expecting a baby girl a few months into the school year. I worked off and on over the summer to get everything ready for the school year, in addition to working with the teacher that would be taking over during my maternity leave. I had done this two times before with the boys – I really didn’t expect it to be any different this time around. The return of that professional time was wonderful.

We hired a wonderful nanny for our boys. Each day I would come home to stories of the adventures they had and projects they worked on. Each day coming home though looking forward to the time I had with them, albeit only a few hours each day.

Then Madison was born.

I couldn’t go back to work.

After both of the boys were born I had no choice but to go back to work, it was financially necessary. With Madison we were able to afford for me to stay at home with some budget adjustments. I just couldn’t do it. I quit my job several months after she was born knowing full well now the life I was choosing as a stay at home mom, and things have been much better. I am choosing this life now and choosing to be with my children when they are young knowing what the job will really entail.

I’ve written about the internal struggle of teaching and being a stay at home mom. Having lived the life of working out of the home out of necessity, stating home, and working out of the home by choice, I do know that for me, while the children are young the answer is staying at home.

So I’m back, and have plans to post in a fairly regular nature again – and I have some wonderful plans of posts to share with you in the coming months. So stay tuned.